Garden State Skate: Op Ed: Brad’s Bent

“Brad’s Bent” is a special GSS Op-Ed from Brad Wyatt, am street skater, sponsored by Standard skate shop and all-around charismatic homie.

Claimers...
Ok everybody knows that one guy around town, or has that one friend in the group that does nothing but claim and ruin the day. This guy will roll up to a new spot or watch footage of you or a friend, and instantly start saying ridiculous tricks that he’s going to do there. Most of them are tricks that you’ve never even see this kid try.

So this kid has now claimed it, bragging to you, all your friends, and the filmer that he’s going to bust this trick all week long. Finally the weekend comes, when you might at best have both days off, or if your like me only have one day off to skate.

You guys all wake up early to get your morning, coffee, cigarette, bagel, beer, whatever’s your poison. Calling each other to meet at the local shop or park. Everyone meets up and this guy (the claimer) is no where to be found. Everyone starts calling him, no answer for at least an hour while ppl are skaten warmin up. An hour has gone by finally he answers his phone still in bed, and of course has no ride or gas.

Now this is where everyone starts gettin fed up with him. You guys all go to pick him up. He gets in the car after waitng for him (the claimer) outside for ten minutes. He gets in the car says, “whats up? oh my bad I was hungover, had to do laundry...blah blah.” This is where he finally starts doubting himself, but not fully.

Conversation goes like this....
You: “You ready to do this trick?
We’re goin there now.”
Claimer: “I don’t know I feel shaky from this hangover...”
You: “We’ve been waiting for you all day so far.”
Claimer: “Nah man I got it, watch like 5 trys.”
You: “Alright bro, I hope you get this.”

You guys finally show up to the spot, probably after the hour commute or traffic you just sat in. Get there, everyones checkin it out, skaten around, eyein it up. Few friends jump on whatever, bust the warm ups, or just chill by the filmer while he’s setting up. At this point the claimer is now rollin up, rollin up, rollin up, gettin himself really psyched up. Your thinkin to yourself, “ok he might do this..” The filmer goes over, gets in position, and the claimer is super pumped now... fifteen minutes goes by of him just rollin up, runnin back, rollin up again. Now the complaning starts. “dammit, alright I got this.” or “Bro, this ground is kinda bumpy.” or my personal favorite, “I didn’t think it was this big.”
You guys all think ok he’s not gonna do it, we can still make to another spot. NOPE!
This guy has now realized that he has to give it a try. Another fifteen minutes goes by of him doin the same shit. He starts gettin mad yelling, flinging the board, screaming. Twenty minutes later, finally he tries it, get no where near it. Comes back up passes you and the filmer proababy saying, “Oh yeah I got this.”

Another hour goes by of him trying this damn trick, while you friends are now probably given him dirty looks or yelling to leave. Finally he focuses his board, and he’s over it. At this point it’s a little awkward, but everyone’s relieved to go, but the day is gone, and no one wants to deal with getting kicked out of places, so your last place to skate is where you started off...at the park where everyone met up.

So guys, please don’t be this guy, know your ability to skate, and don’t waste everyone else’s day because your a dumbass that lives in a THPS3 world.
b.w.